In my car I have attached to my rearview mirror a blue disabled parking permit, so that every day when I drive to my college campus for classes or work I am able to park closer to an entrance due to my physical disability. I remember one particular evening, I was driving with a friend onto Abilene Christian University (ACU) campus, and I proceeded with my usual routine of parking in one of the reserved parking spaces close to the building where I work. As I pulled into the space, my friend with a somewhat disgusted look on his face said to me, “girl, you are not handicapped and there ain’t nothing wrong with you, so why are you parking in this reserved spot?”
This blunt statement and question my friend posed may seem awkward to some, but I immediately recognized his intentions as a form of encouragement. We had both grown up having the support system of the black community to guide us over the years. Identifying as a black person I have been able to connect to many people who identify with this same characteristic. Through this social commonality many of us have formulated a relationship that establishes a community for us to be a part of- the black community. Part of the culture of the black community has been to recognize the strength in each of our capabilities along with looking out for one another. Historically, black people have been told that they are inferior to others, meaning the possibilities for blacks to achieve anything they desire is limiting. In order to fight against this negative mindset people within the black community often push themselves harder to prove they can do anything they set their minds to. Further, there is a desire to achieve these endless possibilities without any accommodation or head start in life to make up for this perception of inferiority.
Thus my friends disapproving comments on me parking in a reserved parking spot was an open acknowledgement that he saw my potential in spite of the fact that I have a prosthetic limb on my right leg. In fact, the black community has always been encouraging of my endless possibilities regardless of the fact that I walk with a prosthesis. Of my 22 years of life so far, and of the 13 years that I have lived with a physical disability I have always felt included and encouraged by the black community that I have just as much ability to do as any other.
However, I can not help but admit that the question posed by my friend “why was I parking in a reserved parking space if nothing was wrong with me,” immediately sparked an internal conflict on what exactly did I and others truly understand about my physical capabilities? Just two years ago I became a part of another community that has been fundamental in my personal growth- the disability community. This community has served as a positive influence and attempted to encourage my capabilities. The conflicting part is the messages that each of these communities send is fundamentally different. The encouragement I received as I began to identify as a person with a disability showed me that accepting and requesting accommodation was not only a good thing, but a necessity in order to reach my full potential. I should know that nothing is “wrong with me” simply because I request even simple accommodations such as parking closer to my destination.
Identifying with the black community and the disability community is something that I consider most precious because I am loved and encouraged through both, and have the opportunities to give love and encouragement back to others. However, I do desire a future of understanding that being a person with a disability and having something “wrong” with you are not synonymous statements. Though, it certainly would not kill me to park further away and walk a longer distance to my various destinations, it would also be a good thing to accept the closer parking space. So when my friend attempted to make the encouraging statement “you are not handicap,” I politely but firmly corrected him that “no I am not handicap and nothing is wrong with me, but I am a person with a disability.” This distinction is crucial. So just as James Brown shouts, “Say it Loud! I’m black and I’m proud!” I will say symmetrically and just as loud, “I will not hide! Disability with pride!”
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